I have had the good fortune of working in a large number of cities among a wonderful cross section of people and have been constantly watching especially those very happy go lucky people. This has immensely influenced me. Even in rough weather some guys never lost their sense of humour and I have seen people joking even while losing jobs. Some people are just made like that and sometimes I have felt they are like large volumes of encyclopedias and it might take a life time to learn from them. In this article I am listing few of those qualities that we can emulate.
They keep smiling
It was Steve Maraboli who said “Happiness is not the absence of problems, it’s the ability to deal with them.” It indeed is an astonishing thing that some people are able to laugh through all their worries and keep a merry face all the time. They enthuse you, make you laugh through their jokes and their sense of humour is just superb. You are often amazed as to how lightly they take life. You long to be in the company of such people “Smile more. Smiling can make you and others happy.” Says Roy Bennett.
They live the present
They don’t carry the backpacks of the past or the anxieties of tomorrow. They tend to make the most of the present moment and exploit all opportunities to render the present moment fruitful and enjoyable. “If you want to be happy, do not dwell in the past, and do not worry about the future, focus on living fully in the present” cautions Roy. Bennett.
They don’t steam like an old train
They don’t perspire out, cry for petty things or waste time worrying about things that don’t really matter in life. They never grope in darkness with negative thoughts. They don’t allow their energy to drain or do things that distract their attention. Life’s too short to worry. Roy Bennet again advises us “Don’t waste your time in anger, regrets, worries, and grudges. Life is too short to be unhappy.”
They aspire to know and grow enthused
Their constant pursuit of knowledge is enthusing and inspiring. They are people genuinely interested in life. They never stop learning and use their knowledge for their own and others good. They cherish knowledge, information and are on a life-long quest to learn .
They Take Life as a game
Come whatever -win or lose situation, they are least bothered .They never sit and whimper when things go wrong. They tend to laugh at their own faults, failures and misfortunes. Never discouraged they move ahead in life.
6. Compass set on Opportunity
They are constantly on the lookout for opportunities for betterment of life, being alert like a deer looking out when to leap. They make untiring efforts to find meaningful solutions for their problems and betterment. Every situation is taken as a challenge and they never rest on their oars until they find ultimate success.
Set eyes on the beautiful world around
They find time to take long walks on a country side and listen to those birds chirping and enjoy the smell of those exotic flowers. They sing and whistle all the way around. As we all know we have a wonderful collection of old age Hindi songs. Most of the happy people I found were fantastic fans of music dance drama etc. they are keen to talk to the smallest of people, hear their stories and they always encourage.
Always with a helping hand
I know a senior officer who cancelled out all his days’ important engagements and sent the car racing to his friend’s house one day where his friend’s father just expired. He stayed the whole day there to complete ceremonial arrangements for a fair farewell to the father. It was Leo Tolstoy who said “A quiet secluded life in the country, with the possibility of being useful to people to whom it is easy to do good, and who are not accustomed to have it done to them; then work which one hopes may be of some use; then rest, nature, books, music, love for one’s neighbor — such is my idea of happiness.”
A monk like attitude towards wealth
There are the people who are usually above those materialistic gains of wealth, position etc. Of course this attribute you find in people in varying proportions. They appear contented all the time with whatever they have. This shouldn’t mean that they have no ambitions what so ever. I mean to say that their cravings for things do not make them go crazy. They’re not crushed if they fail to get what they wanted. When expectations get derailed, they are not upset beyond measure. They approach every situation pragmatically, hoping for the best but being prepared for the worst and reconciling to the realities.
They try to create changes and try out new things, add flavors and spice to make every situation look better and open the floodgates for challenging new experiences, never afraid of failure.
Never draw perfect circles
They are never perfectionists and never set unrealistic goals for themselves. They do not live their lives in a never ending crazy pursuit of unattainable and impossible visions of perfection. They are happy to accept life as it is, with full of blemishes, lacunas and inadequacies.
Always Have a “Plan B”
They are very much aware that plans have a tendency to fail for unexpected reasons and problems cropping up suddenly from somewhere. The people we talk about never worry because they have in reserve a Plan B and Plan C etc. So there is no reasons to withhold them from whatever they wanted to achieve.
They are not the type who fume and fret. Instead they are with a cool, relaxed approach. They do keep a work schedule planned out in such a way that there is no room for any stress or tension to compete the work in time. In short they do not like to sacrifice their valuable leisure time reserved for family, friends and to enjoy life.
They are polite, empathetic
They are a polite lot always respecting others and are friendly with all. They are well mannered and use decent language. This kind of behavior enables them to be popular and well accepted in society.
We all need to realize we are anytime lacking something somewhere. There should be a constant and sustained effort for self-improvement. The people who are the happy lot constantly strive for becoming better and better, in their communications and social interaction.
Always with a positive approach
The capacity for happiness is all a result of the positivity and the quality of your thoughts. Elizabeth Gilbert shares the following beautiful thought with us. “Happiness is the consequence of personal effort. You fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it, and sometimes even travel around the world looking for it. You have to participate relentlessly in the manifestations of your own blessings. And once you have achieved a state of happiness, you must never become lax about maintaining it. You must make a mighty effort to keep swimming upward into that happiness forever, to stay afloat on top of it.”
The Light in the Heart
Roy Bennet in his beautiful book ‘The light in the heart’ says the more you feed your mind with positive thoughts, the more you can attract great things into your life and happiness depends on your mindset and attitude. Perfectionism is the enemy of happiness. Embrace being perfectly imperfect. Learn from your mistakes and forgive yourself, you’ll be happier. We make mistakes because we are imperfect. Learn from mistakes, forgive ourselves, and keep moving forward. Happiness is not a goal. It’s the natural outcome of a life well lived.
Marcel Proust once said “Let us be grateful to the people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.” No doubt the world becomes a better place to live, thanks to the presence of such lively souls on this planet .The great Greek philosopher Aristotle reminds us “Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human existence.”
About the Author
Jose Vazhuthanapilly, BSc., LLB, DBM, CAIIB Retired in 2008 as AGM from State Bank of India. He had worked as a visiting faculty in the Bank’s Staff Training Centers for 5 years. He is a writer with 20 books to his credit including books on self-help / psychology. He resides in Ernakulam, Kochi. He is active also in social service. He can be contacted at email@example.com
- Prasangakarkkulla Kadhakal – St. Paul’s Books, Eranakulam
- EQ – Vyakti Jeevitham Mikavuttathakkam – Sophia Books, Calicut
- Atma Viswasathinte Karuthu Nedam – Sophia Books, Calicut
- Mano Sankharshangale Keezhadakkan Chila Prayogika Margangal – Media House, Calicut
- Vijayam Ningalude Ullil Thanneyanu – Vimala Books
More from the author
- Empathy – The Essence of Human Relations
- Can you laugh at yourself?
- Will Cultural Ethos Influence Crime?
- Do You Need the Magic Wand of Perfection?
- What Parents Need to Know About Peer Pressure
- Foreseeable Clouds of Divorce
- Laziness and hidden signs of Avolition
- Are Women Better Leaders?
- Resilience: A Ticket For Survival
- What Trauma Does To A Child
- Is Promiscuity A Good Idea?
- A Tool to Gain Emotional Stability
- Laughter Is No Joke, Seriously
- Is Happiness A Country Trait?
- Give The Youth A Dream To Live For
- The Need To Enliven Your Creativity
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